Proverbs 15:1 A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.

I think that I need to have this scripture tattooed on the inside of my eyelids so that I see it all the time.

I don’t know about you but I NEED to see it all the time.

Raising children can be a war zone and dealing with attitudes can be hard work.  I am constantly reminding our younger ones to follow instructions and work dilligently and complete their school work.

Sometimes they just don’t get it and yes it is frustrating.

That is why I need to remember this scripture.

I tend to be harsh with my younger children when they don’t listen and when I have to constantly remind them to listen.  The more they don’t listen the louder I get, and the louder I get the more stubborn and hurt and angry they get.



I think you get the picture and it isn’t pretty, anger and frustration is never pretty and it isn’t the way we should be.

So how can I change???

When I started looking there were plenty of scriptures to help me.

Romans 12:2  Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.

James 4:7 Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

Psalm 50:14 And call upon me in the day of trouble; I will deliver you, and you shall glorify me.

Maybe, just maybe if I surrender my days to God, I am sure, no, I know that God will deliver me from my harshness and frustration.

Here is my prayer for the morning…

Lord, please help me to surrender my days to you. Please give me a gentle and quiet spirit. Please help me to stay calm and remember to think about what I say and how I say it before I do.

All this I ask in Jesus name.  Amen


50 thoughts on “A SOFT ANSWER”

  1. It’s always a challenge for me to respond with kind words when I am frustrated. I always have to remind myself to take a breath and think before I respond.

  2. I think this is a struggle that all those who involved in the care of young children struggle with. It seems there are so many needs, so many questions, and so many difficult behaviors that it can be at times frustrating. I try to remember though how the Lord feels about me, as I am His child, and how even though He speaks gently and kind to me many times, yet there are times He needs to speak loudly, and maybe even somewhat harshly through circumstances to get my attention, yet it is in love. It doesn’t give us reason to be mean and unkind, but sometimes love is “tough” in order to get the job done. Blessings and hugs to you today! 🙂

  3. The tongue is set on fire from hell, who can tame it? James… Yes it is so hard to use kind words with our kids sometimes! This is definitely something I struggle with. Joining you in prayer that I can hold my tongue more often. Visiting from #tellhisstory

  4. We’ve all been there while raising our children. Let’s face it, they bring out the best in us and the worse. I have to often refer back to the book of James on taming my tongue. What is wonderful though, is He forgive us each and every time! We need to do the same and try, and try again to be more like Him!

  5. I also need to pray daily for a gently and quiet spirit. Thank you for sharing this reminder on the Art of Home-Making Mondays.

  6. Such truth in your thoughts and Scripture passages. And I also need to remind myself of these truths with my husband since I don’t have my children at home any more. But I don’t want to make blunt or thoughtless remarks to him.

  7. Thanks for sharing this scripture! I have been in a ‘war zone’ dealing with my toddler and baby… the toddler especially. I find praying throughout the day helps!

    1. Sounds like we are the same Jennifer, I too have a quick tongue and then the regret comes. Thankfully we serve an awesome God. Thanks for hosting and stopping by and commenting. Have a great weekend. Blessings

  8. I love this! I’ve so needed this this past week because my three year old is being… three. He’s decided that he wants to stay home all day, only wear pajamas and Elmo slippers, eat nothing but granola bars, and that if I need to go somewhere (especially an essential place like picking up his older brother who was sick and desperately needed to come home) he is perfectly capable of being left home alone. I beg to differ and this usually means that we’ve dissolved into a puddle of tears… I know these days will pass, but it is so easy when I’m tired and worn down to not be as gentle as I should be. Thanks so much for the encouragement! There are many things so much more important than Elmo slippers 24/7!
    -Sara, uncommongrace.net

    1. Thank you Sara for sharing a glimpse into your life with us. I agree with you that there are more important things than Elmo slippers 24/7 and I also know how easy it is to be harsh when we are tired. I pray that God will give you extra energy to help you deal with your little ones. Thanks for stopping by. Have a great weekend. Blessings

  9. Dear Terri,

    It is hard living with other sinners like us, isn’t it! 🙂

    I love Prov. 15.1. It reminds me that it isn’t about just not yelling or saying something harsh. It’s about giving a soft answer. Eph. 4.29 says to put off any unwholesome words and put on (replace them) with words that are edifying, timely and filled with grace. I have found it helps to focus on what I should do instead of what I shouldn’t … that soft answer.

    Thanks for a great reminder and thanks for linking up at Mondays @ Soul Survival. Blessings, my friend. Pinning on my Mondays @ Board.

    1. Thank you so much Donna for sharing the Ephesians scripture with me, that is a good one to have on hand as well. Oh to be edifying and grace filled when times are tough. Thanks for hosting and for taking the time in your busy schedule to comment. Have a great weekend. Blessings to you and yours.

  10. Oh boy, do I need your words today! Thanks for the reminder. I’m going to focus on Psalm 50:14 today. I like how not only when we call on God in our trouble will He deliver us, but He will also help help us to glorify Him when we are obedient and doing what is right. Thanks for your words.

  11. Wow, do I ever need this! Like you, I homeschool, and I find the volume going up with Algebra! “DIVIDE THE BOTTOM INTO THE TOP AND PUT THE REMAINDER OVER THE DENOMINATOR!!!!!!!!” Probably not the most effective approach to teaching math, right? Reading you today at Fellowship Friday, and thankful for your reminder that a soft answer turns away wrath — but a harsh word stirs up anger (and doesn’t help much with fractions, either . . .).

    1. Oh Michele you definitely made me chuckle, sometimes I teach math like that too, actually more the learning to read part and you are right, harsh words do not help. Sounds like we both need the reminder. Thank you so much for your comment and for stopping by today and really blessing me. Have a great weekend and all the best with your Algebra. Blessings

    1. Oh Linda that, I’m sure, is what we are all after, to have a gentle and quiet spirit and for our homes to feel the same. Thanks for your comment and prayer for us all. Blessings

  12. That’s so true. Parenting can be so hard and it’s easy to forget that our priorities are not their priorities. Sometimes a little humor helps too, and honestly I think you remember something said in a joking way more than something said in an angry way.

    1. Thanks so much Mary for sharing your thoughts with us. I think it is important to focus on God and His word to help us remain calm, and I need to remind myself too so much to do this. Have a great weekend. Blessings

  13. When you find a way to tattoo something on the inside of your eyeball, let me know where to go. I feel that about the scripture, be swift to hear and slow to speak. Just when I think I am doing well in this department, some struggle hits me and I get that verse re-versed. It’s an ongoing work for sure. Loved this post.

    1. Definitely Betty, I will let you know, but until then maybe we should just memorise the scripture passage instead :-). Yes I am like you too, it goes well for so long and then bang it is reversed. Thanks for your comment and for sharing your thoughts with us. Blessings

  14. It is very difficult to do this all the time. Luckily God does not ask us to do this. He knows we are imperfect and is forgiving. We must also be forgiving of ourselves.

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